I just read a terrific article by Joe Pinsker in the Atlantic: “Why So Many Smart People Aren’t Happy.” Pretty provocative title, and there’s a specific aspect of this happiness (whether for smart people or for anyone else) that I find intriguing.
It turns out that there are three things that are key components of being happy:
1. Relationships: Meaningful relationships with other people (friends and family).
2. Mastery: Being good at what you spend a lot of your time doing (which is a pretty decent, if incomplete, definition of Mastery – or at least Competence).
3. Autonomy: Feeling in control over making decisions about your life.
I’m most interested in the Mastery part of happiness. I’ve certainly seen that the Mastery quest itself can make people happy. Even if you don’t attain the level of Mastery you originally envision, just trying to get there – whether in karate, music, pottery, golf, writing, or any other of a thousand pursuits – leads to a sense of satisfaction.
I’ve also seen that people who attain Mastery can be profoundly unhappy. This is the part of the Atlantic article that’s worth your time reading. The article is an interview with Raj Raghunathan, a professor in the Business School at The University of Texas.
Raghunathan fully acknowledges that Mastery is part of the happiness equation. And, he outlines two ways that people think about Mastery. One leads to happiness. The other leads to unhappiness.
How Mastery Makes You Unhappy
First, how Mastery makes you unhappy: If you engage in “social comparisons” where you constantly compare your level of Mastery to the levels of other people, you can feel inadequate, worried, anxious, or worse.
An example of this I use with my presentation clients all the time is this: Please don’t compare your oratory skills to Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. Seeing how you measure up to the 20th century’s most gifted orator is unlikely to make your day any better!
External comparisons have all kinds of negative consequences, even if you think you are more Masterful at a skill or more successful than other people. Looking outward is not how you achieve happiness.
How Mastery Makes You Happy
Rather than comparing ourselves to others, we all have the opportunity to use ourselves as our own Mastery gauge. This “self comparison” approach gives you a different set of questions than the questions that naturally arise when you compare yourself to others.
With the self-comparison approach, you can ask yourself things like:
- Am I better at this today than I was yesterday, or one month ago, or one year ago?
- Am I working toward the level of Mastery that I want to attain?
- Am I thankful for having this activity or skill in my life?
Each of these questions gives you an inward focus and explores what is meaningful for you. When you engage in activities that are meaningful to you, you’re likely to continually improve and find deeper levels of enjoyment in the activity the more you do it.
Finding Meaning in Mastery
I certainly can’t answer the question of why smart people are happier or unhappier than other people. And, I’d rather see this topic addressed to all people, no matter their level of intelligence or attainment in life.
I do clearly see that people who work toward goals that are personally meaningful and interesting do attain a level of happiness or satisfaction that is not attained by people who have no goals at all. My belief is that the quest for Mastery gives us both meaning and humility. Meaning and humility seem to cause a type of grounding that can make you truly happy with the activities in your life.
